When Did We Adults Forget How to Play?

(Taking work and life more lightly)

Have you ever wondered when the days went from fun-filled to dread-inducing? School days weren’t always a picnic, but there was recess and goofing off with friends. When did adulting become such a serious occupation?

It’s true that as we grow older, we tend to become more preoccupied with work, responsibilities, and the challenges of adult life. The pressures and demands of adulthood can sometimes overshadow the need for leisure, relaxation, and playfulness.

Of course, there is the societal expectation that kids play and grownups work and a host of other cultural norms and personal beliefs that factor into this issue.  So maybe it’s time to blow up some of those notions.  Below are some reasons for the “seriousness” of adulting, and some ways to turn it around.

1. As people transition into adulthood, they typically take on more responsibilities such as careers, finances, and family obligations. These demands can leave less time and energy for recreational activities and play. So while it’s true that “the bills must be paid and the laundry done,” the energy with which we approach these tasks can make all the difference.  

Instead of approaching the work week with dread or cynicism, how about being open to seeing things with fresh eyes? Instead of putting your armor on, ready to do battle, is it possible to approach the week with a sense of adventure? You can create new playful experiments to try and inject some new energy into the daily grind.

2. Society often places greater emphasis on productivity and achievement in adulthood. These things are all well and good and necessary for a functioning society. That said, have we maybe taken these things a bit too far? Most people I know find it challenging to prioritize leisure activities and play without feeling guilty or unproductive.

So I give you full permission to be LAZY and 100% spontaneous one day a week.  If a whole day sounds ambitious, how about starting with a few hours.  And “lazy” means not doing anything that could be construed as productive.  It’s for your own good!

3. Modern life is often characterized by high levels of stress and long hours at work. The constant pursuit of career success and financial stability can make the idea of “play” sound frivolous or indulgent or simply out of reach. How this became the norm is beyond me, but unfortunately, many adults find themselves caught in a cycle of work-related stress that hampers their ability to engage in playful activities. There are obviously structural issues at play here that we have little control over. That said, it is a good idea to ask yourself, is there something that can give?

Often we are juggling so many balls, that we forget we can actually put some of them down.  It’s also important to reassess your values on a regular basis. Perhaps hustling and grinding made sense at one point in your career, but is it necessary now? Or perhaps your current profession is no longer a good fit for your health and lifestyle needs. I have worked with many people who made career changes that vastly improved their quality of life.  But even if these changes don’t seem to be possible, a small shift in priorities can make a big difference in how your days feel.

Here’s the thing. It’s never too late to reconnect with the joy of play and bring that energy to work and other areas of life. It may just not be possible some days, but even setting the intention to allow more play into your life can open you up to the possibility of having a different experience of life.

So have fun with the experiments, and let me know how it goes!